Kiddo & I have a secret: We met before he was born.
Exactly one month before I gave birth, I had a blissful dream. I dreamt that I could hold
my baby, even though he was still inside me. My tummy had become transparent and amorphous, like a see-through
bubble that could stretch. In this
state, I could see and hold my baby – yet he was surrounded by the bubble, so I
couldn’t really touch him. While
still connected to me, the bubble stretched so that the baby floated out and into
my arms.
Holding him close, with his cheek against my chest, we fit like two
puzzle pieces that completed each other’s picture. At some point, he floated up and we were face to face. Then
the bubble started to retract, taking the baby inside with it… back to his humble
abode in my body. I awoke missing that warm closeness I felt while holding him,
and a sense that my baby -- in a beautiful way -- had just revealed himself to me. Then, the realization set in that I wasn’t ready to wake from my dream.
Fast forward over a month, and amidst the blur of late night feedings and sleep deprivation, I had a moment of clarity. In the wee hours one night, I found myself sitting in the
dark, holding my sleeping baby against my chest… surrounded by stillness and calm… just
us. This was how we first met. It was then that I realized I
never really awoke from that dream.
